13th April 2007, Friday the thirteenth as it was fated to be, but ill-fated for only one team. Celtic pulled away as losers to a 3 goal thumping in this world class match, Criminals being the more superior stock this time.

A change of tactics was revised and applied to this match, which gave the Criminals more attacking width and backup and cover options to help out in various areas of the field.

A 4-2-3-1 formation allowed more support for lone center forward Jon upfront whilst offering the defense more cover. The spatial division between each group also allowed easy swapping of places should anyone tire.

The match kicked off with Jon and Jing in the center circle, The Criminals felt nervous facing such a huge team, but did their best to keep away the butterflies in their stomachs.

Several good passes into the game, and we had a few shots on goal. The first one a sniper bullet from outside the penalty area by Jon, who harried the defense all night.

Then on the 18th minute, a foul by a Celtic centerback gave Jon the opportunity to draw first blood right outside the penalty box with a superbly swung freekick over their 4 man wall.

The game went up one level and there seemed to be a hyped samba rhythm amidst the team, there were passes strung forward,

sidewards,

and Shankar style(Look at the hands! Signature move!)

But Celtic soon caught up with the Crooks' and played their game on us, a few long balls in from their half were met with by the defense.



But soon after, the defense grew weary, and a forced corner saw Ariff palm the ball to safety amidst the looming presences of the Celtic players. Well done, and at half time the Crooks were up 1 goal to nil.

Trouble found it's way somehow much alter and at the start of the second period, the Criminals found themselves facing a firing squad.

Spurred on by the pressure we were given, Khalis drove up the defensive midfield line and placed even haevier impositions on the Scots.

His inspiring work rate gave the rest a surge of adrenaline too, crowding out the Celtic space and retaining possession more often with swarm effect tackling.

Everything in our path was swept away, we took the Scottish football gameplan and threw it right back at them, even the Chinese referee!

But that's not to say stupid things didn't happen, a harrowing moment almost gave Celtic the equaliser when Shankar decided that he needed to practice his Indian dance routine inside the penalty box.

Thank heavens for Ariff's prowess at ball stopping, or Shankar would surely have been given a dressing down in the dressing room.

Then notions of Thatcherism came to life when one of the vulgar Scots decided to outrage Jing with phallic jokes. She, he, she yes she took no nonsense from him and slammed it into the back of the net. Girl power! What a ball breaker from the Left-Winger. Her own invective in response to the earlier obloquy by the Scots.
2-0 to the Criminals! A wondrous result no one would have thought feasible against a team like Celtic, but we were riding on a high, and Jon rode taht wave to create a third and final devastation for the night, bodying away the Celtic fullback to expertly slot the ball past Boruc again.
And with that, a resounding 3-0 victory for the Criminals! Their first win in their fresh history of 4 games, and how fittingly and sweet it has been to be against a quality side like Celtic!

Celebrations then took place in Shankar's house where lots of cheers and congratulations went around. Criminals march on!

In an off-the-field incident, the FA and the club are investigating claims of internal disruption caused by left-back Izzat and defender Shankar on claims of homosexuality creating much unease inside the camp. This report was filed when an anonymous person sent in this revealing photograph of the 2 in a compromising position.